Breaking News!

((The following airs on the eleven o'clock news, 08/24/12.))

Police have finished investigations on two explosions that occurred in the city of Buffalo. While originally believed to be caused by leaks in gas lines, further investigation has shown sources of accelerant in both explosions, both similarly using combinations of household chemicals deliberately spread around gas lines and other sensitive areas. Police have now determined these are cases of arson, not mere accidents. However, there seems to be a lack of public outcry as further investigations have discovered the two houses in the lower West and East side that were targeted seem to have been dens of crime, one the center of a dog fighting ring, the other a major location for the distribution of narcotics throughout the Buffalo area.

Some local citizens have spoken out on the matter:

"Whoever this is, they need to stop. Who are they to decide who lives and who dies?"

"You know, I think they in deep with this, why else would they know where these people are? Yeah, they got problems and are just tryin' to get out!"

"Took long enough for someone to clean up these streets! Cops don't care, now we have someone on our side!"

"I wish I knew who it was...I would just...hug him. Haha!"

The police have disclosed a reminder that vigilantism is highly illegal. The Buffalo Police Department is looking any information on the identities or whereabouts of the individual or individuals responsible for these crimes, and will compensate for any testimonies given. Tips can be given anonymously at 1-800-555-2259.